I wish I had a dollar for every person, who, when confronted with their negativity, claimed they weren’t being negative, they were just being realistic. Actually I wouldn’t mind having a buck or two for every time I said that too. The truth is when we’re constantly pointing out the negative in most every situation we’re probably being negative. That’s unhelpful to everyone involved in the situation, especially ourselves.

But the other side of the coin can be just as bad. Being overly optimistic can cause us to make too risky decisions. Things don’t just “work out best” because we believe they will. Thinks work out best for those who are best at working things out.

That requires a completely realistic view of the potential pluses and minuses of a given situation. Remaining realistic in all situations is a skill that can be developed. It typically involves developing a mindset and approach that aligns with the actual circumstances and probabilities of a situation. If you’re interested in truly becoming more realistic here are some ideas that can help.

• Objective Assessment: Evaluate situations objectively without letting emotions cloud your judgment. Consider facts and evidence rather than relying on personal feelings. This is where the old adage, “sleep on it” comes in handy. Things often look very different in the morning than they did the night before.

• Acceptance of Reality: Acknowledge and accept the current reality, even if it’s not ideal. Avoid wishful thinking or denying the truth to create a more accurate understanding of your circumstances.

• Critical Thinking: Engage in critical thinking by questioning assumptions and considering different perspectives. This helps in forming a more well-rounded and realistic view of situations. Don’t automatically assume that everything you think is true actually is.

• Goal Setting: Set achievable and realistic goals. Unrealistic expectations can lead to disappointment and frustration. Break down larger goals into smaller, manageable steps.

• Learn from Experience: Reflect on past experiences and learn from them. Analyze both successes and failures to gain insights into what worked and what didn’t. Use this knowledge to make informed decisions.

• Consider Probabilities: When assessing future outcomes, consider the probabilities involved. Avoid overestimating positive outcomes or underestimating potential challenges.

• Balance Optimism with Realism: While optimism is valuable, it’s important to balance it with realism. Strive for a positive outlook without losing sight of the practical aspects of a situation.

• Seek Feedback: Gather feedback from others to gain different perspectives and insights. This external input can help you see things from a more realistic standpoint. And make sure that feedback you seek isn’t coming from only people who agree with you. You’ll often learn more from people who you disagree with than you will from people already aligned with your beliefs.

• Stay Informed: Stay informed about the facts and relevant information related to your areas of interest. Being well-informed contributes to a more realistic understanding of the world around you. Be careful with your sources of information too, this may come as a surprise but social media isn’t always the most accurate source for information.

• Flexibility: Be open to adjusting your plans and expectations based on new information or changing circumstances. Flexibility is key to adapting to reality. Remember, if you can’t change your mind, you can’t change anything.

Don’t forget, being realistic doesn’t mean being negative or pessimistic. It’s about approaching situations with a clear understanding of what is likely to happen and making decisions based on that understanding. Better decisions lead directly to a better life, and that’s about as real as it gets.